At times, during the course of one’s life, even if you try as hard as much as you can, you are not able to relate with those people. Still, as a human being, you try to empathize with the problems that are being faced by the other person (Boman et al. 2015). One thing that has really fascinated me is how different life would have been if I had been born as a woman (Boman et al., 2015). With the passage of time, this realization dawned on me that we are living in a man’s world. Every rule, every convention, and every other thing that one gets to see these days is based on how men want it to be. There is no consideration for women and how they go about their things. One of the prime reasons that women are not able to make progress is that they are not allowed to make progress (Boman et al. 2015). Thus, it would be interesting to see and witness the world from different perspectives, and there is nothing better than understanding the problem than if one imagines one’s life with that major physical change. It is about imagining how different life would have been if I had been born as a girl (Boman et al. 2015).
Now, the starting point of the whole thing is how one would have dressed up. Being a man, you are always entitled to be comfortable with your body (Zuckerman et al. 2016). Thus, even if you’re having a bad hair day or not feeling like shaving, it is fine, as there are still not going to be many people who would judge you by the way you look. On the other hand, as I started my day as a woman, the first thing that I had to make sure of was to cope with the relentless pressure with regard to the way I look (Boman et al. 2015). That means I had to spend considerable time in the morning to make sure that I looked the part, and there was no margin of error due to the fact that not only men but even women would not approve of me if I was not looking my best for a single day (Boman et al. 2015). I had to make sure that my hairstyle was just about perfect and that my makeup was up to the mark (Mohr et al., 2015). There are some other details as well to the grooming that I had to take care of, and that means that a considerable part of my day would be spent on making sure that I look right (Boman et al. 2015).
Then comes the fact that how things are going to work out at the workplace. When it comes to men, things are much simpler, as it is their performance that matters (Boman et al., 2015). If they are not able to perform, then they should be working on their skill set (Boman et al. 2015). If they are performing at the appropriate level, then it means that they have done well for themselves. For women, though, spending one day as a woman, I realized the fact that how things are different (Boman et al. 2015). If I bring about an improvement in my skill set and I am able to perform in the right manner, then all the people are going to say that just because I am a woman, I am using my charms to get things done (Boman et al. 2015). On the other hand, God forbid if things go wrong, then there is the fact that women are not supposed to do this job, and suddenly, it feels that I am responsible and accountable for the whole gender on my part (Boman et al. 2015).
At the same time, the common perception about women is that they gossip a lot, but spending one day as a woman, I realized that men also gossip, and most of the time, the center of attention or the discussion that they had was about the attire of their female colleagues and the way they look (Boman et al. 2015). The thing that was most hurting was that some of the male colleagues who were very nice when they were interacting with you were saying mean things in your absence. Again, spending day as women I realized the fact that how it is a men’s world that we are supposed to live in and how they have molded everything that suits their narrative to say the least (Boman et al. 2015). The same thing was witnessed in terms of the way appraisals and promotions worked out (Mohr et al., 2015). I felt that if the female colleague was able to get good appraisals, then it must be due to the fact that she shares a “good working relationship” with the boss rather than getting things on her own. On the other hand, if one talks about men, then the appraisal or performance evaluation that they must be getting is all based on the aptitude and the skill set that they have shown at the workplace, and it has nothing to do with their respective gender (Boman et al. 2015).
Spending the day as a woman, I realized another thing that made me realize my mistake at a personal level (Boman et al. 2015). And it is about the way harassment is perceived in our society (Boman et al., 2015). Most of the time, when one talks about the way harassment is being done, it is about initiating physical contact with the woman without her willingness (Boman et al. 2015). The way harassment is perceived differs from one person to another, and most of the time, it is the men who come up with the definition regarding what is harassment and what would not count as harassment (Boman et al. 2015). Spending the day as a woman, I realized that there are little things that can make you as a woman uncomfortable (Boman et al. 2015). Little things such as initiating physical contact or getting too close to someone without their approval. Looking at someone in a provocative manner or smiling or passing lewd gestures (Boman et al. 2015).
All these things made me uncomfortable, but the sad fact was that they were carried out by all men at different stages of the day (Boman et al. 2015). The most unsettling aspect of the whole day was how some of the women had resigned to the fact that harassment is something that they have to live with, and the only thing that they can do is to move forward and not pay heed to these people (Boman et al. 2015). They were not comfortable with coming forward and reporting these incidents despite the fact that there was an anti-harassment policy in the workplace due to the fact that most of the time, if they come forward, it is the women themselves who are being blamed rather than men who actually initiated the whole thing at the first place (Love et al. 2015). It was the fear of being judged and, later on, being asked questions about the thing they had no control over that stopped them from coming forward and reporting the incident (Love et al. 2015).
Spending one day as a woman and being among women made me realize the importance of the me-too movement and how important it is for women to step forward and make themselves count in the first place (Love et al. 2015). Being a man, I was not able to relate to the movement and thought it was something of a hyperbole and attention-seeking effort on the part of the men (Love et al. 2015); that is not the case, and spending one day as a woman made you realize that how harassment is something serious and how much effort and conviction is required for the victim to come forward and bring the accuser to the shame (Love et al. 2015).
The other thing that I realized during the course of the day I spent being a woman is that how the way you dress does not make a difference. As I was coming towards my workplace in the morning, despite the fact that I had not dressed in a provocative manner, people were still looking at me in a very objectionable manner (Love et al. 2015). As a matter of fact, the way I was being looked at from head to toe, I felt that I had made a mistake coming out of my home as people were commenting about the way I had dressed (Love et al. 2015).
Again, it boils down to how important it is for the woman to look “right” all the time and make sure that not only does she look decent, but she does not look that shabby as well. It changed my perception that only the women who had dressed in a provocative manner were the ones facing the problems, but that is not the case as no matter what the attire of the women, they are going to be judged regardless of what happens (Mejias et al. 2014). Social acceptance is an important part of the whole makeup of women, and they have to make sure that they conform to the standards that are set by society with regard to the way they are supposed to behave all the time.
Being men, we are not supposed to face such pressure, and if there is an effort on our part to make sure that we are going against the norms of society, most of the time, the effort is going to be appreciated all the time (Mejias et al. 2014). The degree of freedom that men have in any society is always on the higher side than that of women (Mohr et al. 2015). Not only that, but the number of times rejections that women had to face, the concept of the glass ceiling started to make sense to me as I spent one day as a woman (Mejias et al. 2014). Not only that, the grounds on which it was rejected were also quite different as compared to men, as most of the time, the rejection came due to the fact that I belonged to the opposite gender (Mejias et al. 2014).
Spending one day as a woman, though, there was another feeling that I developed, and that was immense respect for women(Mejias et al. 2014). As I spent some time with women at my workplace, it was brilliant to see how they were able to take care of their homes while also making sure that their professional responsibilities were not compromised (Mejias et al. 2014). They were doing a good job looking after their children as well as making sure that everything was right at home while also concentrating their full attention in the office (Mejias et al. 2014). Not only that, they were also able to make sure that they looked after the household responsibilities in the appropriate manner (Mohr et al. 2015).
As a man, at times, one gets the feeling that you have a sense of self-entitlement as things are always given to you on a platter, so you develop this feeling that you start taking things for granted (Mohr et al. 2015). That is not the case with women as most of the time, they are not only supposed to make sure that they are looking after the home, but even if there are kids, then mothers are the ones that take care of the kids most of the times (Mohr et al. 2015). It is expected that they will take care of the children, but despite this fact, there is no feeling of resentment on their part, and they take care of this responsibility with full aplomb. As a matter of fact, it is one of these things that make women better than men due to the fact that they nurture and look after the new life in the appropriate manner, something that men would have a hard time taking care of in the first place (Mohr et al. 2015). In hindsight, spending one day as a woman allowed me to develop a new perspective with regard to the way women are supposed to spend their lives and what are some of the pressures that they have to face most of the time with regard to their appearance (Mohr et al. 2015).
Works Cited
Boman, Tomas, et al. “Employment opportunities for persons with different types of disability.” ALTER-European Journal of Disability Research/Revue Européenne de Recherche sur le Handicap 9.2 (2015): 116-129.
Love, Carolyn D., Lize AE Booysen, and Philomena Essed. “An exploration of the intersection of race, gender and generation in African American women doing social justice work.” Gender, Work & Organization (2015).
Mejias, Norma J., Carol J. Gill, and Carmit-Noa Shpigelman. “Influence of a support group for young women with disabilities on sense of belonging.” Journal of Counseling Psychology 61.2 (2014): 208.
Mohr, Rebecca I., and Valerie Purdie-Vaughns. “Diversity within women of color: Why experiences change felt stigma.” Sex Roles 73.9-10 (2015): 391-398.
Zuckerman, Miron, Chen Li, and Judith A. Hall. “When men and women differ in self-esteem and when they don’t: A meta-analysis.” Journal of Research in Personality 64 (2016): 34-51.
