Divorce and separation impacts on the development of infants, toddlers and preschoolers and learning of the effects of divorce on children is important for early childhood professionals to help children cope with different changes they are undergoing through in their lives. Divorce evokes different emotional changes and behavior among children and it is important to learn about them early enough so that appropriate developmental nurturing for the children in the face of divorce can be given.
Some of the notable effects of divorce on children include weakened parent-child relationships. In the event of a divorce between couples another divorce occurs between the parents and children. The relationship between the parent and the child starts to deteriorate after divorce. Parents are bedeviled by two different problems after a divorce. Parents have to adjust to their own intrapsychic conflicts and their roles as divorced people. The stress that comes with divorce interferes with their relationship with their children. Children become less emotionally supported; receive less financial assistance and parental guidance. This weakened relationship between both parents creates distance between the families.
Divorce also effect the attitude and behavior of the children. Boys usually tend to be more hostile especially those under the custody of their mothers and the girls often fare worse than the boys when they stay with their fathers. Children affection for both parents starts to wane and they become totally detached from both parents.
As a professional expert who helps families and family members cope up after a divorce it is important to know your span of practice in order to avoid wading into areas where your professional boundaries is limited. The process of coping up starts with giving professional advice to the divorced parents. It is important for both parents to discuss visitation arrangement for the children before making plans or suggesting to them. Both parents should discuss issues such child custody and sharing of the responsibilities.
It is also important for the family members to respectful to each and recognizes the set boundaries. Both parents should recognize each other decision and respect it. Parents should keep their routines as normal as possible since children tend to feel safe and confident if they know what to expect. Both parents should control their feelings and never vent the out towards the children. One way of keeping their feelings in check is by doing exercise to free their mind of the divorce issues.
Both parents and family members should stay-kid focused and they should monitor changes in their behavior and attitude. It is also important to avoid putting children in the middles of the divorce and never use them as messengers. This will help avoid putting them at the centre of conflict since the goals should be to keep children out of relationship issues which might affect their development and behavior.
Communication between the divorced and the family members should also be restrained, respectful and be a business like tone. This is importance because it will make arrangement of issues such as child custody and sharing of property easier.
To help children in divorced family it is important to ensure that the parents are in unity after the divorce. Professional experts should try to foster compromise between the divorced couples to agree on things such as education for their children, medical needs and financial issues. Both parents should be advised to be committed to their children needs and development.
