At times, during the course of one’s life, even if you try as hard as much as you can, you are not able to relate with those people. Still, as a human being, you try to empathies with the problems that are being faced by the other person (Boman et al. 2015). One thing though that has really fascinated me is that how different life would have been if I was born as a women (Boman et al. 2015). With the passage of time, this realization dawned on me is that we are living in a man’s world. Every rule, every convention and every other thing that one gets to see these days is based on the fact that how men want it to be. There is no consideration for women and how they go about their things. It is one of the prime reasons that women are not able to make progress due to the fact that they are not allowed to make progress (Boman et al. 2015). Thus it would be interesting to see and witnessed the world from different perspective and there is nothing better than understanding the problem then if one imagines their life with that major physical change. It is about imagining how different life would have been if I was born was a girl (Boman et al. 2015).
Now, the starting point of the whole thing is that how one would have dressed up. Being men, you are always entitled to be comfortable with your body (Zuckerman et al. 2016). And thus even if you’re having a bad hair day, or not feeling like shaving, it is fine as still there are not going to be many people that would be judging you by the way you look. On the other hand, as one started my day as women, the first thing that I had to make sure was to cope with the relentless pressure with regards to the way I look (Boman et al. 2015). That means I had to spend considerable time in the morning to make sure that I look the part, and there is no margin of error due to the fact that not only men, but even women would not approve of me if I was not looking my best for a single day (Boman et al. 2015). I had to make sure that my hairstyle is just about perfect, and whether my makeup is up to the mark (Mohr et al. 2015). There are some other details as well to the grooming that I had to take care of and that means that considerable part of my day would be spend on making sure that I look right (Boman et al. 2015).
Then comes the fact that how things are going to work out at the workplace. When it comes to men, things are much simpler as it is their performance that matters (Boman et al. 2015). If they are not able to perform, then they should be working on their skill set (Boman et al. 2015). If they are performing at the appropriate level, then it means that they have done well for themselves. For women though, spending one day as a women I realized the fact that how things are different (Boman et al. 2015). If I bring about an improvement in my skill set and I am able to perform in the right manner, then all the people are going to say that just because I am a woman, I am using my charms to get things done (Boman et al. 2015). On the other hand, God forbid if things go wrong, then there is the fact that women are not supposed to do this job and suddenly it feels that I am responsible and accountable for the whole gender on my part (Boman et al. 2015).
At the same time, the common perception about women is that they gossip a lot, but spending one day as women I realized that men also gossip, and most of the times, the centre of attention or the discussion that they had was about the attire of their female colleagues and the way they look (Boman et al. 2015). Thing that was most hurting that some of the male colleagues that were very nice when they were interacting to you were saying mean things in your absence. Again, spending day as women I realized the fact that how it is a men’s world that we are supposed to live in and how they have molded everything that suits their narrative to say the least (Boman et al. 2015). The same thing was witnessed in terms of the way appraisals and promotions worked out (Mohr et al. 2015). I felt that if the women colleague was able to get good appraisals, then it must be due to the fact that she shares “good working relationship” with the boss rather than getting things on her own. On the other hand, if one talks about men, then the appraisal or performance evaluation that they must be getting is all based on the aptitude and the skill set that they have showed at the workplace and it has nothing to do with their respective gender (Boman et al. 2015).
Spending the day as women, I realized another thing that made me realize my mistake at the personal level (Boman et al. 2015). And it is about the way harassment has been perceived in our society (Boman et al. 2015). Most of the times, when one talks about the way harassment are being done; it is about initiating a physical contact with the women without her willingness (Boman et al. 2015). The way harassment is perceived differs from one person to the another and most of the times, it is the men who come up with the definition regarding what is harassment and what would not count as harassment (Boman et al. 2015). Spending day as a women, I realized that there are little things that can make you as a women uncomfortable (Boman et al. 2015). Little thing such as initiating physical contact or getting too close to someone without their approval. Looking at someone in a provocative manner or smiling or passing lewd gestures (Boman et al. 2015).
All these things were able to make me uncomfortable but the sad fact was that these were carried out by all men at different stages of the day altogether (Boman et al. 2015). The most unsettling aspect of the whole day was that how some of the women had resigned to the fact that harassment is something that they have to live with and the only thing that they can do is to move forward and do not pay heed to these people (Boman et al. 2015). They were not comfortable with coming forward and reporting these incidents despite the fact that there was anti harassment policy in the workplace due to the fact that most of the times if they come forward, it is the women themselves who are being blamed rather than men who actually initiated the whole thing at the first place (Love et al. 2015). It was the fear of being judged and later on being asked questions about the thing that they had no control over was something that had stopped them from coming forward and reporting the incident (Love et al. 2015).
Spending one day as a women and being among women made me realize the importance of the me-too movement and how important it is for the women to step forward and make they count at the first place (Love et al. 2015). Being a men, I was not able to relate to the movement and thought it was something of a hyperbole and attention seeking effort on the part of the men (Love et al. 2015), That is not the case and spending one day as women made you realize that how harassment is something serious and how much effort and conviction is required for the victim to come forward and bring the accuser to the shame (Love et al. 2015).
The other thing that was realized by me during the course of the day as I spend being women is that how the way you dress does not make a difference. As I was coming towards my workplace in the morning, despite the fact that I had not dressed in a provocative manner, people were still looking at me in a very objectionable manner (Love et al. 2015). As a matter of fact, the way I was being looked from head to toe, I felt that I had made a mistake coming out from my home as people were commenting about the way I had dressed (Love et al. 2015).
Again it boils down to the fact that how important it is for the women to look “right” all the time and make sure that not only she looks decent, but is not looking that shabby as well. It changed my perception that only the women who had dressed in the provocative manner is the one that is facing the problems, but that is not the case as not matter what is the attire of the women, they are going to be judged regardless of what happens (Mejias et al. 2014). The social acceptance is an important part of the whole makeup of the women and they have to make sure that they confirm to the standards that are set by the society with regards to the way they are supposed to behave all the time.
Being men, we are not supposed to face such pressure and if there is an effort on our part to make sure that we are going against the norms of the society, most of the times the effort is going to be appreciated all the time (Mejias et al. 2014). The degree of freedom that men have in any society is always on the higher side as compared to women (Mohr et al. 2015). Not only that, the amount of times the rejections that women had to face, the concept of the glass ceiling started to make sense to me as I spend one day as women (Mejias et al. 2014). Not only that, the grounds on which it was rejected were also quite different as compared to men as most of the times, the rejection came due to the fact that I belonged to the opposite gender (Mejias et al. 2014).
Spending one day as a women though, there is another feeling that I developed and that was the immense respect for the women(Mejias et al. 2014). As I spend some time among women at my workplace, it was brilliant to see that how they were able to take care of their home while also making sure that their professional responsibilities are not compromised (Mejias et al. 2014). They were doing a good job looking after their children as well as making sure that everything is right in home while also giving their full concentration in office (Mejias et al. 2014). Not only that, they were also able to make sure that they look after the household responsibilities in the appropriate manner (Mohr et al. 2015).
As a man, at times one gets the feeling that you have sense of self entitlement as things are always given to you in platter so you develop this feeling that you start taking things for granted (Mohr et al. 2015). That is not the case with women as most of the times, they are not only supposed to make sure that they are looking after the home, but even if there are kids, then mothers are the ones that take care of the kids most of the times (Mohr et al. 2015). It is expected from them that they would be taking care of the children, but despite this fact, there is no feeling of resentment on their part and they take care of this responsibility with full aplomb. As a matter of fact, it is one of these things that make women better than men due to the fact that nurture and look after the new life in the appropriate manner, something that men would have hard time taking care off at the first place (Mohr et al. 2015). In the hindsight, spending one day as women allowed me to developed new perspective with regards to the way women are supposed to spend their life and what are some of the pressures that they have to face most of the times with regards to their appearance (Mohr et al. 2015).
Works Cited
Boman, Tomas, et al. “Employment opportunities for persons with different types of disability.” ALTER-European Journal of Disability Research/Revue Européenne de Recherche sur le Handicap 9.2 (2015): 116-129.
Love, Carolyn D., Lize AE Booysen, and Philomena Essed. “An exploration of the intersection of race, gender and generation in African American women doing social justice work.” Gender, Work & Organization (2015).
Mejias, Norma J., Carol J. Gill, and Carmit-Noa Shpigelman. “Influence of a support group for young women with disabilities on sense of belonging.” Journal of counseling psychology 61.2 (2014): 208.
Mohr, Rebecca I., and Valerie Purdie-Vaughns. “Diversity within women of color: Why experiences change felt stigma.” Sex Roles 73.9-10 (2015): 391-398.
Zuckerman, Miron, Chen Li, and Judith A. Hall. “When men and women differ in self-esteem and when they don’t: A meta-analysis.” Journal of Research in Personality 64 (2016): 34-51.
